Colca Canyon

Sunbathing time drinking back crates of cold Corona was now officially over as at 3am we were sat on a coach getting driven down rumbling rocky roads on route for a lengthy three day trek in Colca Canyon, the second deepest canyon in the world.

Before descending into the 3191m deep terrain we were taken to Cruz del Condor where we would hopefully spot some Andean condors in flight. The moment we stepped out of the coach luck seemed to be on our side as at least six black winged gliders were in view over the jaw dropping canyon. However, things didn´t go quite to plan though as it was now 9.30am and our guide named Angel (a miniature superhero who would look just like Speedy González if given a Mexican hat) informed us that our included breakfast was actually not so included. Not only were all three of us starving but after our 2am wake up call we were desperately needing a caffeine fix- in particular Laura, who was more than a little grumbly. By the time we had squeezed our way through the biggest crowd of tourists gathered in one place in our entire 9 months over to a stall selling bananas, the condors had all simply vanished and they didn`t coming back.

Slightly gutted not to have seized the moment with the camera when we had the chance we drove onwards to the dusty streets of Cabanaconde where we were told we would finally get some food. Well unfortunately not, as the restaurant Angel was going to take us to was closed during Easter and all of the other places to eat that were actually open he deemed too expensive. Angel said that he would buy our lunch from a local shop and that we could dine in the canyon at 3pm. 3pm!!!? Our superhero guide really wasn´t giving the best of starts and with members of our group scattered over the plaza looking lost to who their actual tour was with, this trip came across like it would be a complete un-organised disaster. Angel then disappeared for twenty minutes so we made the most of it by running over to the nearest cafe for a damn good coffee and gather whatever snacks we could quickly find.

Another twenty minutes on and we were finally all gathered together and could now work out who we were spending the next 3 days with. In our group were Swiss brother and sister act Henry and Alex, who both had firm bulging leg muscles as if they do trekking for a living, a pretty and single Cornish lass (Toby`s eyes lit up) called Erica who had already somehow managed to loose her trousers, and Hilary and Anne-Marie, two madames from Canada. A real mixed bag but first impressions seemed great for us to all get along.

We set off on an easy stroll across a beautiful sprawling plain with the ever present snowy mountains around us and soon reached San Miguel. Unfortunately for Toby not a beer drenched paradise but an incredible view point over Colca and three villages that cling to the canyon walls of which two we would visit the following day.

Next up was our first proper workout as we headed on a steep three hour downhill climb to the village of San Juan de Chuccho where we would get some lunch. The crumbly hike past vast amounts of giant cacti around narrow cliff edges overlooking the sharp canyon drop below was far more spectacular then we could have imagined and the camera was in use on every corner. Our new Swiss companions were in predicted form as they both shot off miles in front while the madames kept behind struggling with the altitude.

Our hunger gave us a good pace though and soon we reached the gorgeous village which was overgrown with rich green plant life and welcoming inhabitants. We sat in a little wooden shack and began to get to know one another in our group whilst rapidly chomping through some tasty llama and chips (though Laura was rewarded with yet another omelet).

After lunch we made a gradual two hour uphill trek towards our accommodation for the night in the high village of Coshnirwa. Again it was another enjoyable walk over rickety bridges, past lush waterfalls cascading to the canyon deep below and lessons from Angel to what the various plants along the trail can be used for, which included the nasty acidic like white juice that seeps out of one plant named Piri-piri that local women mix with their tea to induce a miscarriage. Toby, Henry and I all made the mistake of spotting the fruit that grows on the top of the Tuna cacti before our guide did, which resulted in hundreds of almost invisible spiky hairs being pricked into our hands- we won`t be doing that again!

Arriving later at another perfectly set village 2,450m up we were greeted by an adorable little boy with a pump action water gun which inspired Toby and I to be kids again by diving behind oil cans and doing cam mo rolls across the floor with our pretend finger pistols. Needless to say the young kid absolutely loved our war game antics and was in fits of giggles. An hour later when we strolled up for dinner the boy had recruited his friend and older sister to join in for a second shoot out, although this time they came armed with sticks which they swiped us with- not quite as fun.

The evening was spent with Toby, Laura and I dangling our feet off of the balcony of our mud hut gazing up at the brightly star lit sky that shined down upon the stunning scenery around us. Whilst we nattered over a good vodka and coke life couldn´t have been any better, until Laura noticed that both of her rings had gone missing. This led to a lengthy hunt of the grounds asking anyone and everyone in the village if they had seen them. Laura thinks she probably left them in the bathroom for what must have been twenty minutes after she washed her hands but either way they never turned up. A real shame but at least it wasn´t the bling engagement ring!

The next morning we had good motivation to get up and hike fast down the canyon as we were heading for the Oasis Paradise resort of Sangalle, complete with palm trees overlooking swimming pools next to a bar full of booze and food. Whether it was Toby´s competitive steak or the thought of alcohol that made him blast off and keep up with the fit Swiss duo I don´t know, but the three of them were first down to the wondrous setting lapping up every second of it. A blissful couple of hours were spent playing ball games in the pool, eating huge mounds of spaghetti, sunbathing like sea lions on the rocks and swinging in the relaxing hammocks.

Our following challenge was the hardest task of the whole three days as we had to ascend to the the top of the insanely steep Colca wall in front of us. It was going to take three tough hours to reach the summit and with the sun baring down upon us at this easy going resort we were a little hesitant to head off.

We soon left though with Toby and Henry challenging each other to run up the mountain as fast as humanly possible. The group then dispersed far apart for the climb which lead to our guide showing us his Speedy González skills racing up to the front and back of our group repeatedly checking if we were still all OK- Angel was really starting to shine and surely must have down twice the work that we did. A sweaty yet beautiful hike saw the boys finishing top in an impressive 1 hour 45m, myself in 2 hours 15m and Laura and Erica 15 minutes later- I´m not sure about everyone else´s time but we were chuffed with our efforts!

We trekked back to the town of Cabanaconde along a small path that weaved a pretty way through fields of crops and checked into a hotel with the best hot shower in a very very long time. After a lovely final meal out together we all crashed out in some equally satisfying beds.

The next day before taking the long coach journey back to Arequipa we had one last quick walk thirty minutes out of town to Mirador Achachiwa. This view point was one of the most special sights of the trek and plenty of photos followed.

It was time to bid farewell to the canyon and it`s unbelievable surroundings. After such a rocky start to the tour it really did turn out to be a fantastic highlight of South America and was the ideal pre-work out for our massive upcoming Inca trail trek to Machu Picchu.

Arriving early evening back in Arequipa we wanted to go out and celebrate the end of a brilliant three days with our new hiking buddies. Not only that but it was Toby`s last night with us already. However, with the madames needing a good sleep, Henry falling ill and Laura with a sudden bad case of things spurting out both ends at the same time, it was only Toby, myself and Erica who met up for a drink. Despite the lack of party go´ers, the dark psychedelic club called Deja Vu, full of fast spinning red and green laser lights over a banging dance floor, along with the arrival of a lively guy from Iran that we had met on the bus back from Colca and his new mate (the muscle bound Mr Arequipa 2009) our one drink turned into a great handful more.

Within an hour of eating some fine giant pizzas and necking back some mohitos Toby was up first to shake his money maker in the club, which was now rapidly filling up with large groups of single looking women who must have outnumbered the men by ten to one. The rest of us soon followed after we heard the dance floor loudly cheer Toby on. Being the only white males along with a single Erica it has to be said that we got a lot of winks and cheeky smiles from both the women and the men. One group of guys with ´TECHNO¨ tattooed on their biceps were more then a little excited to see me as they thought I was a famous electronica artist from Argentina. When I told them that I wasn´t the same guy but I was a musician who played that sort of music I´m not sure if they understood as they were even more keen to repeatedly offer me drinks. Thinking that they were nice lads but I wasn´t in for a possible night of date rape man on man action I declined. The rest of the night was a blur of thumping cheesy tunes and hilariously bad dance moves.

We stumbled back to our hotel around 3am where Laura was in a bit of a sorry state. She had been sick at least three times since we had been out and looked completely out of it. Had it have not been Toby´s farewell night I would have stayed in to rub her back or something. But I did go out and frankly, it was amazing and a totally brilliant end to a totally brilliant Toby filled week. Unfortunately at 4.30am things didn´t quite end how I would have liked as I awoke in extreme agony with my ribs feeling like they were going to collapse. After quite amusingly calling out Laura´s name repeatedly for five minutes (in an old man´s voice- ¨Laaaaurrrwwraaa, Laaaaauwwraaa¨) and not realising she had ear plugs in and Toby thinking that I was talking in my sleep, I took my watch off and aimed it at her head, or pillow should I say. Either way, I hit the wall instead, so I struggled up and leaned over grabbing the corner of her bed sheet which I yanked back and forth until Laura woke up from a dream in which she thought that she was in the middle of an earthquake. With the lights on it turned out that I also had a big puffy tongue and lips three times their normal size. After Laura gave me some antihistamines I calmed down and feel back asleep.

Early the next morning fearing that I might have meningitis or a serious heart condition Laura called the local doctor. Within an hour I had a Peruvian Karl Kennedy at my bedside. Just a few minutes later and he had me roll over on the bed and pull down my pants for what I had expected to be a painful prick in the bum- instead he inserted his honking sized jab stick straight into my spine. Quite possibly one of the most intense pains my body has ever experienced- and he didn´t even wop out his acoustic guitar and sing to make me feel better. However, by the time to doc was about to leave after a very efficient check, I could actually feel my lips and tongue again. He took a blood sample and would return a few hours on to give the results but with a high temperature and an indescribable fever he warned me against attempting our trek to Machu Picchu. This really didn´t look good. Not just that, but frustratingly annoying for Laura, I had completely trumped her illness.

I said a frail good bye to Toby that I can hardly remember and then an hour later the doctor returned. I awoke feeling much better with my temperature and face back to normal, but with the test results showing that I had some form of intoxication but everything was still inconclusive the doctor insisted that I was to wait a further 24 hours and see him again the next day.

Whatever was in that needle it certainly did the trick as the next morning I was in top form, almost too good to be true. At 5pm Laura and I headed over to the surgery out of town where the nurse signed a form saying that I was fit enough to hike the Inca Trail- we were more than a little chuffed and excited! That night we boarded a night bus to Cuzco for our last challenge of our journey. With such anticipation along with an incredible build up, would Machu Picchu be everything that we hoped it to be?